Dear Life,

You're a bitch. I hate you.

Sincerely,
Rachel

I just watched Dr. Briggs unplug someone's computer, take their power cord, and hand them a pen and a piece of paper because they weren't writing an algorithm before starting on the program. Awesome.

Watch porn

I made cookies last week, but now I want cake.

Cake, cake, cake!

My dad's supposed to be transferring money to my account soon so I can buy clothes for fall and winter, but surely there can't be any harm in spending some of that on cake making stuffs too... right?

Also, I keep ruining my crochet project. It'll never be finished by November. Oh well, I guess. Bridesmaids aren't really expected to give bridal shower or wedding gifts anyway. Buying ridiculously expensive dresses that we're only going to wear once is apparently enough. :-D

I made cookies last night, yummy white chip chocolate cookies, because they're all I've been thinking about lately, yet I left them at Travis's apartment and can't go get them. I really want one right now. They will probably be all gone by the time I'm over there next. All the sadness in the world for me.

I want to walk through a wood where the paths were made by deer instead of people.
I want to run through a field where no one can see me and all I can hear is the crackling of the power lines overhead.
I want to wade in a creek without being scared I'll catch some sort of disease because of how dirty the water is.
I want to be able to hang bird feeders outside my window so I can watch the goldfinches and hear them sing.
I want vanilla Italian cream soda.

And I think I want to be as scarce as possible for the remainder of the week.

The wedding is over, so no more fear of having my head bitten off by bridezilla. Yay! Everything turned out all right and the ceremony was nice, even though I felt like asploding during certain parts of it. This whole extremist idea of being subject to one's husband just irks me. Won't go there right now.

( And as much as I hate to admit it... )

When we were getting ready, I was thinking how this was the only wedding I'd have to be in this year and then it would all be over. I wouldn't have to worry about paying for a dress that I really couldn't afford or any of the other stuff that comes along with being in a wedding. After the ceremony, I went back to our changing room to put my bouquet up for the reception and noticed that I had several text messages from my sister. I opened my phone to pictures of my cousin, Jess, in a wedding gown. Apparently, she'd moved her wedding date up from July 2010 to this November and had bought her dress as I was participating in my best friend's wedding....

I am to be a bridesmaid in this wedding too, but I have no idea how I'm ever going to afford it. Jess and I pretty much grew up together and maybe we don't get along all the time, but I want to be there for her as a bridesmaid when she gets married. With the recent financial complications though, I'm not sure how I'm even going to afford any of the things I'll need once I'm back at school. I'm trying not to worry about it, but sometimes it just feels impossible.

Male stripper... Yeah, definitely the male stripper.

So, I've been home for an entire month now. I've been running around, doing this and that, and feeling very busy, but when it all comes down to it, I haven't really accomplished anything. Unless you count making people mad at me. In that case, I've been more productive than ever.

Rules to live by
* When you plan a bridal shower, put the mothers-in-law in their place before things get out of hand, and don't confide in the bride-to-be (even if she is your best friend and you just want someone to talk to) about anything the mothers-in-law have said or done, no matter how innocent it seems, for she will be just as over dramatic as they are.

* In relation to that, don't ask said bride-to-be if you're allowed to change out of your bridesmaid dress for the reception. She will momentarily forget that inquiry is not the equivalent of complaint and then accuse you of "not being on her side" and "not supporting her" and want you to "stop complaining."

* Also, don't tell said bride-to-be that you might not be able to make it to her lingerie party because you're trying to be in Virginia that week. She will start accusing you of choosing your college friends over your best friend. This will be ironic, considering you're the maid of honor in her wedding, you planned and paid for her bridal shower, and you found someone willing to host her lingerie party since you couldn't afford to throw both the lingerie party and bridal shower.

* Actually, just don't get involved in anything that has to do with weddings. Ever. It's a bad idea. A very bad idea.

EDIT:

* Hug a kitten. It will instantly make things better.

My roommate's hamster died today. No more Niglet.